Starting Your Own Business: Lessons That Actually Work

Thinking about starting your own business? You’re not alone. More people than ever are making the jump from employee to entrepreneur. But how do you actually make it work?

Let me share some real lessons from building a business from scratch—the stuff that actually matters, not the fluff you read in most business books.

Get Comfortable With Risk (It’s Not What You Think)

Here’s the truth: you need to learn how to take risks. But not crazy, reckless risks. Calculated ones.

Before starting a mortgage brokerage, there was experience with real estate investing. Buying rental properties, fixing them up, dealing with problem tenants—all of that teaches you something valuable. Every challenge becomes a learning tool. Every risk you take prepares you for the next one.

The fear on that first rental property was real. “What if the tenants don’t pay? How will I cover the mortgage?” Sound familiar? But here’s the thing: you can overcome that fear. That’s what separates people who succeed from those who don’t.

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Just Do It (Yes, Really)

You’ve heard this before, but it’s true. You have to take action.

Think about teaching kids to swim. They’re scared of the pool. But the second they jump in? They love it. The anticipation is worse than the reality.

But here’s where business is different: it’s not a one-time jump. You need to keep swimming. You’ll face roadblocks, challenges, and problems that need solving over and over again.

The Pothole Philosophy

Here’s a way to think about business challenges that makes sense.

When you hit a pothole while driving, it’s loud and bumpy. It might even damage your car. But do you abandon your car right there and walk away? Of course not. You keep driving. Maybe you get it fixed. Maybe you learn to spot potholes and drive around them next time.

Yet when people hit a roadblock in business—or in dating, or asking for a raise, or pursuing any goal—they do exactly that. They abandon the whole thing and never try again.

Don’t let fear make your decisions. You wouldn’t leave your car at a pothole. Don’t leave your business at one either.

Write Down Your Goals (Even If You Think It’s Silly)

This one seemed pointless at first. Write down goals? Really? But after hearing it repeatedly from successful people, it was time to try it.

Here’s why it works: writing something down makes it real in your brain. Your body and brain don’t actually know the difference between visualization and reality. That’s not motivational speaker nonsense—it’s how your brain works.

If you die in a dream, you can actually die in real life. That’s why you always wake up before hitting the ground when you’re falling. Your brain thinks it’s real.

Use that to your advantage. Visualize your goals as if they’ve already happened. Not wondering how they’ll happen—experiencing them as current reality. Some goals show up fast. Others take five or ten years. Don’t let the timeline bother you.

Set Goals The Smart Way

Don’t set just one big goal. Here’s why: if you hit it, you feel accomplished and lose motivation. The satisfaction actually works against you.

Instead, do this:

• Set your big goal (the one you really want)
• Set even bigger, crazier goals beyond that
• Break the journey into smaller steps

Want to make $100,000 this year? Great. But start with $50. Then $75. Then $100. Each small win gives you energy to keep going.

Most businesses fail because they set huge goals, get discouraged when they don’t hit them fast enough, and quit. Don’t be that person.

Know Your Strengths (You Probably Don’t)

Here’s an exercise that will change everything: ask people who know you what your strengths and weaknesses are. Tell them you’re working on personal development and want honest feedback.

What you think you’re good at might not match reality. Someone else might see strengths you didn’t know you had. Other people see you more clearly than you see yourself because you’re stuck in your own head.

And here’s the controversial part: don’t focus on your weaknesses. Focus on your strengths.

Sure, you could spend time getting better at things you’re bad at. But you’ll only ever be mediocre at them. If you focus on your natural strengths, you can be excellent.

If you must work on weaknesses, use the 95/5 rule: spend 95 hours on strengths, 5 hours on weaknesses.

Watch Your Thoughts

Negative thoughts—even the ones you don’t say out loud—will bring you down. Your brain makes them real.

Think about it like eating. One chocolate bar doesn’t make you unhealthy. But one chocolate bar every day for five years? You’ll see the difference. Same with thoughts. One negative thought seems harmless. But over time, they pile up and drag you down.

When you catch yourself thinking something negative, stop. Find something good instead. Something positive about your business, your family, your situation.

This does two things: it makes you happier, and it creates a winning mindset. And mindset is everything.

Just starting a business doesn’t mean you have a successful business. If you think you’re a loser, that people won’t buy from you, that you’re not good enough—you’ll be right. Your mindset creates your reality.

Surround Yourself With The Right People

If you’re negative, you attract negative people. If you’re positive, you attract positive people. Simple as that.

As you become more positive, you’ll notice the negative people in your life. They’ll bother you because they bring you down. You need to spend less time with them.

But don’t be hasty. Ask yourself: are they negative because you were negative? If you become more positive, will they follow?

Some people are leaders. Some are followers. Don’t throw someone away without understanding the dynamics.

But if someone is negative because they’re jealous of your success? If they try to shoot down every idea because they’re unhappy with their own life? That person has to go. They’re trying to damage you, even if it’s subconscious.

Keep Learning

You need to invest in yourself. Courses, books, seminars, training—whatever helps you grow.

Life is busy. But if you don’t create even a couple hours a week for self-improvement, you won’t reach the next level. Block out the time. Tell people you’re busy. It’s hard at first, but it gets easier.

Here’s a confession: reading is not enjoyable for everyone. But it still happens because it helps with growth. The last book taught something important about structure in business—something that wouldn’t have been learned otherwise.

That’s the value of continuous learning. You don’t know what you don’t know. Books, courses, and mentors fill those gaps.

The Bottom Line

Starting a business isn’t about having a perfect plan or waiting until you’re ready. You’ll never feel ready. It’s about taking action, learning from every challenge, and refusing to quit when you hit obstacles.

Focus on your strengths. Protect your mindset. Surround yourself with positive people. Keep learning. Set goals that motivate you instead of overwhelming you.

And most importantly: don’t abandon your car at the pothole. Keep driving.

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Frequently Asked Questions

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